Unfortunate Events Can Lead to Inner Strength

Yesterday I was making some changes to my living and dining rooms. I moved some things around to open up the space and improve the flow of energy. When I had started my impromptu interior design challenge, I had piles of books everywhere. After finally finding some homes for the books, one remained. And so, I randomly opened up, “The Dalai Lama’s Book of Wisdom” and began reading the following on page 33.


“When unfortunate things happen in our lives there are two possible results. One possibility is mental unrest, anxiety, fear, doubt, frustration and eventually depression, and, in the worst case, even suicide. That's one way. The other possibility is that because of that tragic experience you become more realistic, you become closer to reality. With the power of investigation, the tragic experience may make you stronger and increase your self-confidence and self-reliance. The unfortunate event can be a source of inner strength.”


How perfect and timely this piece of wisdom was as over the past few weeks I’ve felt like a butterfly shedding its old cocoon. Reading these words reminded me that when unfortunate events used to happen to me I would fall under mental unrest. Stress, anxiety, insomnia, frustration, doubt, fear, anger, etc. would befall me and sometimes in the heaviest of ways.



I used to work for this company that was super dysfunctional. My boss at the time was a mess. She had her own personal problems to deal with and took out her personal stress on everyone at work. Yelling, rude and disrespectful behavior, lack of consideration and leadership were some of her poorer qualities. She was a great example of the leader I would not be.


Meditation and visualization were huge for me then (and still are) and I would visualize myself rising above her and her ways that stressed me out. Those visualizations and meditations helped me to see and feel my inner strength and know that I was the only one that could allow myself to be stressed out, unhappy, frustrated, angry, etc. Remembering the integrity model that I learned from my first life coach, which stated that me and me alone could change two things in any given scenario, my actions or my thoughts. In the meantime, while I plotted my exit from that company (changing my action), the visualization of me rising above her and her BS, helped me to change my thoughts. I was able to see clearly that none of this was happening to me, that I was leading the design and execution of my life; that I had more choices than was immediately apparent and if I kept exploring I would find them; that I would learn this lesson so that I didn’t have to continue learning it.


It can be difficult to gain control during an unfortunate event, or a series of. There are emotions to contend with, sometimes logistics of the event have to be dealt with, and a countless number of other things, but when you stop and take a breath and realize that not everything is happening to you, there, in that moment you can find the inner strength to carry on.


So my awesome readers, which result do you typically lean towards?


With love and light,